Do no’s lead to yes’s?

Hey guys,

In cold call prospecting sales trainer, a sales trainer will often try to motivate the salespeople by telling them things such as, “celebrate the no’s because every no means you’re one step closer to a yes.”

Some attraction trainers say the same thing—getting a “no” from a girl is no big deal, because it means you are closer to a yes.

Are they right?

Well, yes and no, so to speak. They are right in that you shouldn’t let yourself be bothered by a “no” because no one, not even the most attractive man in the world will get a yes all the time. In fact, he will get more no’s than yes’s because he asks so much.

However, there is an undisclosed lie here, something few sales trainers want to acknowledge: if you are dealing with a group of uninterested prospects, all a “no” gets you is closer to another “no.”

In other words, you will never get to a yes.

The same thing holds true in attraction—if you are in the wrong “market” you will never get a yes, only no’s.

Consider this: a dark dance club with more men than women, a smoke machine, loud music, and women who are there with their friends, intent on teasing men and nothing more. Do you think you will get a lot of no’s there?

Yes. Yes you will. Do you think you will get any yes’s there? Highly doubtful. You are dealing with uninterested prospects, in an environment that is not conducive to attraction, with lots of competition. A no gets you closer to another no.

But, let’s say you are speaking at an event with lots of women in the audience, and a bunch of girlie men. And you’re good from the front of the room. What are your odds of getting a “yes?”

Pretty darn good. In fact, they will compete to say yes to you because you have properly constructed the environment. And even if you do get a no, a yes is around the corner.

So, don’t believe the statement, “celebrate the no’s” without proper context. Improper environment simply gets you another no. Proper environment gets you the occasional no, with lots of yes’s.

On with the fun….

-John Alanis
“The King of Let ‘em Come to You”

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